God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
not ubering you a puppy
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
