My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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