Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
