when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Randomize