You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Randomize
