i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
so much tequila, so little girl.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
