the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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