Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize
