Christians are straight up FREAKS
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Everclear isn't food dammit
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize