The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
