Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
