She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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