if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
