it's like iHOP with fire
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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