Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Randomize
