I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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