wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
