take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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