You're so nebulous sometimes
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I have already put on my inside pants.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
