I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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