Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I understand Curling. That high.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
