the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
