Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
