You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
