The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize