I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
