Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
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