My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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