Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
