the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
