Umm I'm too high to move.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
