they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
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