that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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