New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize