my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
