So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
