I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
