Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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