she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
