Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
