so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I think your dad took our porno
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
