She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize
