just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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