I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
