i may or may not be watching the land before time
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
