He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
everyone is single if you try hard enough
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
