Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
