shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize