so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
You're like the curious george of whores
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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