I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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