sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize